Dignity, Always Dignity

by Esther Suson

When there is an important job interview coming up the next day, dignity and composure are paramount to pre-interview success. Here are steps that, if followed, will bring you to your interview with dignity and composure intact.

  1. Do nothing productive the night before because the stomach butterflies are too rowdy.
  2. Go to bed early.
  3. Toss and turn sleeplessly because of those stomach butterflies you failed to hush.
  4. Oversleep.
  5. Take a hasty half-bath so it won’t look like you just took a bath.
  6. Brush your teeth.
  7. Hunt in all bags and cupboards for your make-up kit, and finally find it in the make-shift bookshelf on your upper bunk bed.
  8. Apply eye shadow and lipstick, admire face in mirror.
  9. Feverishly hunt for ID needed to get you into the building,
  10. Give up on finding toe-sole-ankle socks and settle for normal ones.
  11. Remember that you had homework to research on that organization and feverishly print out random details from  their website.
  12. As you are about to walk out the door, remember that a responsible interviewee always brings a copy of her CV, and feverishly run back to print one.
  13. Print the outdated copy.
  14. Print the updated copy.
  15. Sprint out that door.
  16. Sprint to the fx stop.
  17. Sprint into the fx.
  18. Wait for fx to fill up.
  19. Read homework half of the way.
  20. Will fx to go faster the other half of the way.
  21. Get off at a hopefully nearer stop and get lucky.
  22. Rush to the nearest 7/11 to get toe-sole-ankle socks.
  23. Put on socks in 7/11 and pray they don’t think you’re shoplifting.
  24. Rush back to building.
  25. Slow down so your shoes don’t fall off.
  26. Stop to adjust sock slipping off your ankle.
  27. Stop to pick up your shoe.
  28. Trip over step.
  29. Use ID to get in.
  30. You are half-an-hour early. Sit back, relax, and settle yourself. Text loved ones, pray, write, read. When the interviewer arrives, greet them with all dignity and composure intact.

[Written while waiting for a job interview. Non-fiction.].

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